Had some drinks with the girls again in 20s...This is the 3rd continuously day we went there for drink and dance....For me, I can temporary releasing all my stress and emotion there....those temperament moment that I used to miss a lot....I wanted to feel it all over again....
Frankly, I don't feel happy every time I'm in the club.... I had lots of old memories especially those from the moment we met till we broke up!~ I wanna get drunk....but hell ya, I couldn't.....EVERY TIME!!!!>.< Every time I wanted to persuade myself from stopping and think those unhappy things....I failed again and again....so many times.....I still failed!!!!!!!! Can you know how much it hurts????? Can you know how much I dun wanna let this to happen?????
Life without him is getting hard and tough....I gone through every thing by myself.... I gonna pretend in front of everyone....even to myself....how many times I need to pretend to be strong and stay calm in whatever situation.... I am really tired of pretending.....the smile from my heart is missing since the day you are far apart from me..... I just can't help myself from hiding the truth feeling inside myself~
I tried to convince myself to give up.... I tried to convince myself to let go.....
I failed...
I am just a failure....
and the truth is....
I never want you to go....
How many times I tried to hold on....
How many times I tried to be "thick face"....
How many times I act like a immature kids.....
and How many times I get rejected by you meeting me....
I still choose not to give up!!!!!
I am still waiting....
No matter how long I should be waiting....
I will still wait....
wait till the day you can forgive me and accept me again....
I just wish I can have a 2nd chance....
I just want to be with you...
You're the one that I want all these while....
*hope that you can hear the voice of from my heart*
I will still wait for the impossible.....
Baby, please come back to me~
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