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Tuesday, May 4, 2010

Unlucky days~

Back from Camp at Bukit Cahaya for 3 days 2 night. Totally exhausted. Tired but it was FUN!!!:)

The dumb dumb me fell down today at Taipan when I was going to get my car. Carrying a handbag and laptop bag with me, together fell down on the road. *ouch* was the first reaction from me and *wtf* is the second thought of me!!!T.T.....How did I being so careless for not concentrating while walking....It's been a long time since the last time I fell down....Couldn't really recall it but the feeling of "pain" is just there......

Nope! I did not cry. I faced it alone and comfort myself from suffering from pain!! The first time I being calm but my heartbreaks because I am pain but there is no one there for me~ Well, I guess I gotta use to this kind of feeling every time again no matter what happened!

There's too much of misunderstanding and miscommunication between..... I really tired of giving any reason to protect myself! I was blamed because I voice out my thinking....I was blamed for not being completing what I should....I was blamed for being rude and did not respect....I was blamed for everything......Everything that I did totally gone in a sudden.....yea and now I guess I am one of the "famous" among all.....

Why must things getting more complex and complicated??? I did not think of revenge anyone.....I did not think of hurting anyone... I really did not think of getting this matter to become more serious!!!!! I am out of my mind.....I get scold because they think I have the intention of doing it.....Who can I complain to???? Am i really being rude for voice up my thinking and opinion???? If this is not the way I should do, can you tell me what shall I do?????T.T

I have no one I can tell....I have no one that can understand me....I have no one that can lay on when I need a shoulder to cry.....I can just cry silently on my bed without noticing from others....I am stressed! I am out of mind! I am speechless! I am lost! I do not what steps should I take now!!!!~ Can anybody help me????

I guess there's no one that I can depend on......I know I should just settle it myself and be brave for what I should do!!!!!!!I know it! Yes I know it! ):

*For someone who will not read this- Sorry for troubling and disturbing...I know I had trouble you a lot....I know I am so troublesome for you....I know I am depending too much on you....I know I shouldn't find you when I need help.....but I just dun understand why I will just think of you to help me when I have trouble??? I guess is just too much for me to relay on you to help me....I shall just fark off myself from troubling you right??? It's been more than 6 months.....I guess I am just not over you YET!!hells know, everyone knows but you will never know that....Its okay, I know I am just not the right one....You will deserve a better one!sorry....

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