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Saturday, June 2, 2007

hrm...confusing??

dun know why i cant sleep tonite...long time dun have such problem liao lor...until tis nite...im still thinking of many things....sumthing is on my mind...tat i dun think i should think too much!!...but i cant stop my mind from thinking of tat thing!!zzz...i dun understand why i have tat kind of feeling again....i tot...everything was over...everything was settle...everything was going fine wif wat i had done.........but WHY?....why such confusing feeling comes again???!!!
these few days....i keep sms wif him.....suddenly....we became friends again....dun know why....we getting better after all things had happened...but....the feeling on me towards him nv change!!!im still missing him all the time...still thinking of him eventhough i know we cant be together again!!!....tat kind of feeling towards him really very special....cant even describe wif words...juz know tat kind of confusing n complicated feelings cum again....zzz....why these happens AGAIN?!!!
hrm....maybe i still care of him all the time...juz tat....before tat...i was always busy wif school stuff n seldom have the chance to think bout him....!...atcually...i admit tat i still have feeling towards him...but i know....he doesn't have tat kind of feeling towards me anymore!!!....quite sad atcually...but wat to do...im used to it ady!!!all this while....im juz keeping that kind of feeling inside my heart....im juz missing him quietly...without anyone realising....quite tough oso but...i juz dun know who can i tell...cuz my friends doesn't agree wif me all the while...=(.....so...i can oni keep it inside my heart.....i felt tired enuff of missing him....i dun know wat shall i do now anymore!!!!
i really feel happy when he willing to sms wif me n we chit-chatting for few days liao....is juz like...we r going back to time....1 year before....we knew each other.....until we together....until we argue....until we become strangers....until....now......1 year n few months oni....many many many things had happen on us!!!......but i still missing the day....we were together.....i still remember how we hang out together...how we start....how we even break up in school dat day!!!.....those kind of memories....cant even forget in my mind!!!...i really dun know WHY?!!
really hope next week can hang out wif him because he promise wan to cum my house n fetch me....i really wish the day to cum soon...haha....xD.....i hope we can have the feeling again...but i know it's oni my point of view....im the one who thinking TOO MUCH!!!....wat to do.....he really make me like him so deeply.....i juz dun know why will tis happen???.....it's kinda suffering oso because i gotta act tat im ok n i gotta pretend everything was over infront of him....im affraid....if....he know tat i still have feelings towards him...then....he will ignore me again....n we will....again....become STRANGERS!!!!i really dun hope tat kind of situation happens on US again!!!!so plzzz....i juz wanna be friends wif him n care of him.........i dun mind if he really treat me as one if his friend oni....all i wan...juz him to be HAPPY!!!!
i dun know wat will happen next....but...i really apprieciate the time we were together....really wanna thanks to him because i feel the happiness when im wif him!!!...those sweet memories....is unforgettable for me.....will keep in my heart n my mind till i die~~
really hope tat one day i got the chance to say "THANK YOU" to him....hope we can be forever good friends!!!^^...wish him happy n hope he found his love one soon....=)

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